Prodigal Sons

Should I tell the Epic Adventure of Dioge becoming the all time record holder for the Beer Club at Rooney's. The thing is I wasn't there, so I didn't witness it first hand. I'll leave that part for someone else to tell. I was at home, though, when he was done and was dropped off by Helgy, and I do know that side of the story.

It's funny how you find out about things sometimes. Me? I had just got home from work and found the Prod House unusually empty. "Where could everyone be?" I thought. Just then the phone rang. It was Marina, Conall's (the guy who can't stop talking in spanish in his prod-wide emails...that's really pissin me off) girlfriend at the time (now they're engaged). "Is Conall there?" She asked, and after I said, "No" she said, "Oh, he's probably still down at Rooney's with Dioge in the beer contest thing." I was confused because I hadn't heard anything about this, but just then, like a ray of light to dispell all confusion, Dioge stumbles into the house. He looked like he had been in a bull fight, but I later found out that it was a fight with the dirty floor of Rooney's bar. I think he won because he was still standing...kindof.

Getting back to the phone conversation, I said to Marina, "Well, Dioge just got here, and he's wasted." Overhearing me say that, and not knowing who I was talking to, Dioge became incensed. It was time for me to end the conversation and run for my life. Luckily, I had the advantage of sobriety on my side, so I easily escaped the fury of a pissed off Dioge. The long and the short of it, Dioge drank 34 beers in 4 hours and 23 minutes to become the all time record holder for the beer club at Rooney's. Pretty amazing, huh? Not nearly amazing as the next morning when he got up for morning class without a hangover. Liar, you totally had a hangover.


So that's my story and I'm sticking to it, but there's more to Dioge than the alchohol stories. But, I don't know if there are any stories worth telling that don't have alchohol somewhere in them. What other household could strike such a precarious balance as the Prods: fun(alchohol) and God.